Really?

I would imagine most of you, like myself have never heard of NARTH or P4cm, which is probably a good thing. Feministe highlighted some of the absurdity here, back in February. I recall laughing...and somewhat wanting to cry, for the folks featured at P4cm (How many colors can an Ex-Masturbator shirt come in?!). Apparently, my family finds it all but absurd, and what better way to connect with one's bisexual daughter than to email her testimonies of "ex-gays" or other African American girls who "hated being a lesbian." Maybe one day she can wear her very own "Ex-Lesbian' shirt. Oh lawd.

While I don't think it's productive to dismiss a person's own story, I do think it is of the upmost importance that a difference be drawn between a) someone who suffers at the hand of a constant lack of pride or sense of worth, and b)someone who does not experience feelings of conflict between one's orientation and/or identity and their set of personal values and has a developed sense of true pride. Let's not go into how much ignorance, inaccuracy, and intolerance has been uncovered over the decades concerning previous statements regarding sexual orientation. What I will say is that in the much awaited wake of rapidly spreading equality and keener understanding of diversity, there is still much ignorance to obliterate.

Apart from one's personal beliefs or opinions, I've found that lack of knowledge is the biggest wedge that splits connections, or keeps them from cultivating, between gay and straight family members, friends, co-workers, neighbors, "doctors," "patients," etc. It is the continued spread of stereotypes, misconceptions, bigoted statements, assumptions, fears, and raw unwillingness to accept that lead people like my family to believe that they have a solid understanding that is in fact narrow and inaccurate, however human. Equality and sincere pride will not drag their feet, so I hope that my family can invest in some running shoes in time. I'll welcome them should they arrive.